You Have My Love when I’m gone



I asked myself what do I hopes for

Why do I love you knowing that it hopeless?

I feel like you did not care at all.

Every time I texted you and there’s no response

What you mean is breaking my heart

And those moments made me feel like dying

Dying while I’m still alive.

Dying because of missing you.

One-side love is hurt

Because very single night that I lying in bed hoping that one day

You will be mine.

I tried to aloof myself by Listening to French songs

But those love lyrics, one by one made me cry like a baby

It’s sound silly but that’s how love makes me do

I care no more because all I have is her

Her who light my world up

I wake up every day, and see the sun rises

It’s reminds me of how beautiful you are

You like a flowers blossom in spring

Smell like a jasmines that fresh and virgin

Attracted so many butterflies and bees

You look so pure and bright

That’s hooked me in and never get out

I’m so in love with you.

I still remember when you walked in the room

You didn’t look at me but I look at you

In a way full of love and generosity

You sit silently look around and smiles

Those smiles were freezing my heart little by little

The way you talk and express yourself is so perfect

Perfect that made me felt so blessed though you aren’t mine

I’m so lucky just to see your smiles

Just to see you back in a minutes is enough

That’s made my day better and fresher


Guess you may not know how much time I thinking of you

I dream about you every night

Some night I dreamt that I was holding your hand

Some night I dreamt that you care about me

And that’s made me sadder when I realize that it’s weren’t real

Again, I wonder if you ever have some feeling for me

I didn’t want much; just to own a small piece of your heart

A little piece that made you care about me just for sometimes

You made me realize the beauty of the world

The rainbows that I never seen before

But why loving you made me hurt so badly?

Every morning and night, I sit by the window

Looking at the trains moving back and forth

That’s made think of you again

I wonder what you are doing.

What’s in your mind?

Are you happy?

Did the world treat you well?

Do you hear my whisper how much I love you?

Do you feel my love at all?

Should I move on? But I can’t

You mean too much to me

My suffering is bigger and stronger,

But to love you is worthier and greater than that

If I would stop loving you

I would rather give up everything

Just to keep my faith and love for you

Hoping one day you will be mine, forever.

I imagine how right it would be if we were together

I think we are so perfect together

But why I feel so wrong after seeing you each moment

Cos realizing that you will never be mine

I become so emotional and fragile.

I cried some night,

The tears that ran across my cheek were soft and innocent

Asking myself why am I like this?

Is it worth it?

It’s doesn’t matter how many time I asked myself

The answers is still yes

I will always love you, now and forever.

Wherever I go, whether on train or on the road

I keep looking for you,

Hoping that there is a coincidence that allow me to see you everyday

Despite most of the time I didn’t found you

I will always keep looking and hoping to see you again.

Your enchantment is so strong that I can’t resist

I have no choice to love you more and more.

My Catastrophe College Life in Minnesota.


Transition your life to a foreign country could possibly one of the most scariest things, yet an excitement one. Living in Minnesota for almost half year, I found myself miserable yet a rewarded experience.

I feel so confused and overwhelming, all the things that I have to learn and adapt here. Sometimes, I feel like I wasn’t sure if I made the right decision to come here, I feel so lonely and homesick. I found myself trapped in a place where I have no friends, family and someone to rely on.

I feel so lonely that sometimes I get so sad without a reasons. I feel so stress that somehow stop me from enjoy the moment in life. Why am I like this? Because i feel like living without a real friends and sense of belonging is nothing different from having no purpose and what to pursue in life.

People may think living by your own and make a life in new country is easy. But that depend. You may think studying at a big University like Minnesota where home to thousand of students could be easier to make new friends and find your own group of people. But that could be wrong. That’s so fuckin’ wrong.

I spent most of my day in my apartment, sleeping and wandering around. Like a people who having psychopath, boring and uninteresting. I have to see counselor every week, make sure I’m okay. Am I okay?

How can the hell Am I doing okay? All I feel is restlessness and unfulfilled life. The moment when I think how am I going to make it through each semester is nothing less than feeling like stabbing myself with multiple knives. Feeling the pain of the blood running though my veins, everyday and every night.

At some points that I feel like I can’t decide if I need a hug, 5 shots of vodka or two of week of getaway. Just that way, imagine you’re in my situations right now. Feel the pain? Perhaps not. Right now,  I’m nothing but just a helpless human being. I just need some affections and care from at least one person. But then there’s no one you can count on. It make you feel like having a sh*tlife. Totally wasted.

I went to church this morning. Trying to get some positive vibes to calm myself down. Trying to be a spiritual as much as I can. Who know, life can throw you into an insane situations? Sometimes it too insane that you don’t feel like it is a reality, a real life that you living with. So sad!

All in all, this college life made me feel like a f*cking loser. A FAILURE. A cry-laugh impression should be “What’s an intoxicating life you have”.

My and Our Stereotypes.


Learn to forgive-and-Love 🙂 University of Minnesota

Stereotypes are happening everywhere, they are living and ingrained within us. According to the definition from introduction to sociology, “stereotype are the oversimplified ideas about groups of people. Stereotype can be considered on race, gender, ethnicity, career, income, age, sexual orientation and almost any characteristics. “The possible consequences and impacts that stereotypes can create are various, therefore discrimination and arbitrary groups of people in the society are very important. Stereotype can be defined differently from scholars to researchers and general people. If we ask where do stereotypes come from? They could be new or recycled from the past. According to Adichie, an African novelist and writer asserts that stereotype are the form of a single story, “Show people as one thing, over and over again and that is what they become.” People often trap in the bubble when they get only a second story, without acknowledging the truth and fact behind it. Hence, media, power and personal belief can be used to empower or destroy stereotypes; and in many ways that these three factors have played a significance role in our life, especially when it comes to understanding and sharing social events as well as culture around the world.

First of all, media has become one of the most important element in human and world ecosystem. It is so powerful that sometimes people used it to empower or slanted something over another. And that misused activities can lead to many damaging such as culture, value and significance of a group or society. According to Cofer, a professor at Georgia University and the author of an essay call “The myth of Latin Woman: I met a girl name Maria” has commented on how media has portrayed Latin woman and her value in a so-called public commercial. “Mixed cultural signals have perpetuated certain stereotypes- for example of Hispanic woman as the hot-tamale or sexual firebrand. It is a one-dimensional view that media have found easy to promote.” (232). This evidence demonstrates how media injected one-side story again and again, that eventually creates a recycle stereotype among people. Besides, media usually present many stories that are untrue and imbalance just to get more interest and profit. With this in mind, when talking about media creates stereotype and filter bubble, it won’t be complete without including fake news, which usually goes viral faster than real story. Again, during US election campaign could be the best example to talk about media effects, and how it help provides a positive reinforcement to racism in the United States at large.

Equally important, power also one of the main source that nursing stereotype to grow and spread among people. Usually, those who have power will create boundary or define what should be and not acceptable, or how many stories or angles should be told in the society. According to Adichie, “The single story creates stereotype and problem…stereotype is not that they are untrue but that they are incomplete, they make one story become the only story”. It is true when a stereotype once untrue and true mixed together, then it becomes something complete. However, when the single story come in one side, then the matter of the story immediately becomes biased. As Adichie has exclaims in her Ted Talk “my roommate had a single story of African: a single story of catastrophe. In this single, there was no possibility of Africans being similar to her in any way, no possibility of feeling more complex than pity, no possibility of a connection as human equals.” Thus, stereotype and single story are not only the issues of misunderstanding but also a root cause of humanization, which continue to led us to group people and put them in their place forever.

Particularly, I often stereotyped about Africa as poor, hungry, diseases, less education and desert countries. I never knew they also have nature, wildlife, and many resources that available for development. It implied that I received only a single story which is not complete and been slanted by media and my surrounding environments. It seem true that the countries with power and economic leads such as United States have stories in the headline more than poor countries such Africa and Cambodia. What people know about Cambodia is that a place full of war, genocide and poor. It is true but just a small part of our country — Cambodia also home to a world tourism landmark (Angkor Wat) and rich in culture and nature too. However, because the history of Genocide plus having less power, it made that single story so outstanding, which overshadowed the whole image of Cambodia at all. In comparison, such a rich countries like United States usually have a good images representation than poor countries. As my experiences, all I thought about America is great, powerful, rich, and both economic and technological advances. But then I see the economic supremacy and income gaps among people, I realized that I have been deceived by a single story which is dangerous toward my thinking and how I see the world from my little corner of it.
Last but important, stereotype can be created by cultural and personal belief. Sometimes no one tell people to hate others people or humanize them but ourselves and environment itself.

According to Staples, a New York Times journalist and the author of “Just Walk on By: A black Man ponder his power to alter the public space”, this piece of work is unfolded the truth about why and how people themselves perceived stereotype “I soon gathered that being perceived as dangerous is a hazard itself. I become familiar with the language of fear… It is clear that woman thought herself the quarry of a mugger, rapist, perpetrator or worse” (Staples, 239). It is not only that stereotype can makes people feel unsafe but people who are being stereotyped also feel themselves vulnerable and victim too. As Staples said, when a young woman ran away from him because to avoid being a victim, then the situation left Staples to be a victim while he was innocent. In my experience, we often been told by the older people or friends that not to trust black people, they’re not good, perhaps drug dealer or human trafficker too. So we as young, we believe it and subconsciously react to what we have learnt and told. However, my parents did not told me to stereotype or hate other people, but the environment around me does. I tend to hate the group of people if my friends did so. That is to say, stereotype are forming not only from outside but also from inside too.

All in all, stereotyping are really dangerous and they can absent our human-unity and harmony in society. The top three reasons that causes of stereotypes are media, power and personal beliefs. Since one sensational story can overshadowed good story easily, people should educate themselves by trying to understand about other people and questioned things critically so that they can have a better awareness about stereotype. By doing more research, reading, talking and getting to know about other people lives that would be a great contribution to reduce stereotype in our society. If I knew Oprah, Adichie, Mandela earlier, I would not misjudge about African. If people knew that Cambodia is home to world natural and cultural heritage, they would not think Cambodia is a catastrophe. If I know that media have manipulated me about stereotype, I will try to do more reading and be a media literate person, especially not to keep silence when I face such issue. Great models such as Loung, Cofer, Staples, and Adichie, they write and speak to provide a new set of reality. They write to educate, to call for action and to persuade people how stereotype creates problems in society. Additionally, the movement such as “Black Lives Matter” and great stories about African- American on media can really make a huge impacts on how people think about them as a whole. Last but not least, promoting equality and multiculturalism within communities would also allow people to speak up and share their voices better. Through these implications, the stereotype can be reduce and better in the future.
Works Cited/Reference
Cofer, Judith Ortiz. “The myth of the Latin Woman: I met a girl name Maria.”
The Latin Deli: Prose and Poetry, 1993, pp.232
Staples, Brent. “Just Walk On By: A Black Man Ponders His Power to Alter the Public Space.” 1986, pp. 239
Adichie, Chimamanda. “The danger of the Single Story.” Ted Talk, 2009

My paper from Creative Writing Class © 2017 Love Soun


The Politics in Fake News Regimes.


Hubbard School of Journalism and Mass Communication, @University of Minnesota

The new digital arena for information exchanges is limitless. When new form of mass communication develops, the power of political propaganda to influence the public opinions is enormous. It is an era where people find it hard to judge between the truth and falsehood, especially with information and news related to politics or choosing a leader. In many ways social media hands us a great deal of information, which is fast and more visual than the old form of communications; meanwhile, we lose our privacy, personality, identity and voice to the platform. Nowadays, people likes to depend on social media and the internet to learn about what’s happening around the world; therefore, so much blatant bias in political ideology is digested across media products, ranging from advertisements, news, entertainment, and education at large. We ask, what is fake news? Who is responsible for creating and spreading fake news? The answers could be conflated between multiple and specific sources, but according to Titcomb & Carson, fake news comes from “commercially- driven sensational content, nation-state sponsored misinformation, highly partisan news sites, social media itself, and satire and parody”. As a matter of fact, the rise of social media has destroyed the boundaries of news publishing, and allowed fake news amid in democracy and freedom of speech.

Social media has gone beyond social phenomena and has becomes too powerful to influence on us, and eventually reshaping our history, social and political implication. With this view in mind, let look what really happened during US election; especially the piece of information debunking on Russian-Link Ads; it really shaking the way we see false news and how social media influence and running politics in general. A cursory glance showing the splashing of hoaxes, fake news and misinformation from Russian-experimentations of using social network as a propaganda engines was having a cascading effect on decision making and perhaps changing the election result in the United States (Confessore). Many people were outcry, rages, and not happy about the election result including me. The New York Times’s journalist, Shane & Isaac, also emphasized how social media biased when using algorithm to spread the news “On twitter, as on Facebook, Russian fingerprints are on hundreds or thousands of fake accounts that regularly posted anti-Clinton messages.” This evidence illustrates that automatic messages and political campaign-linked ads which forcedly appeared before and after the election were done intentionally to confuse people about event and what happening around them.

In addition to, in fact, the false news stories’ favoring Trump were shared 30 million times on Facebook, while those favoring Clinton were shared only 8 million times in total on Facebook (Allcott & Gentzkow). Even worse-off, the websites and shows such as Fox News, late night shows and memes which contents mainly related to political satire are viewed as problematic and biased (Shane & Isaac). Hence, it surprising me how such a deception and political conspiracy can overdrive and tricked people, and even turning the political-wheel to an entirely different direction. As a research shown, there only 14% of people who said claims to used social media as a main source, but the impact is unmeasurable. That’s why we have to be caution about political advertising on social media and its agenda, because even small percentages of information, but it actually has a great effects on how we think and making decision.

Likewise, fake news is also a serious problem in term of political agenda in Cambodia. The circulating of media manipulation in Cambodia are often views as pro-government and propaganda supremacy. Normally, the leaders would use fake news or make up stories to deceived people or take away their attention from what is really matter to something else. As recently, the 30 years- ruling government using fake news to attack the opposition leader, shut down all the independent media and radios, and became a single party in the country (Cambodia Daily & The Nation, 2017). For example, after shutdown of independent media and jailed opposition leaders, journalists, and human right activists, the pro-government media will put tons of gossips, and achievements that government have done in the past in TV and media. Then the Prime Minister, Hun Sen, would say “Fresh News” is the best news company in Cambodia, while cursing independent media such as The Cambodia Daily, Free Asia Radio, and Voice of America as fakes and foreigner’s lackey. Personally, I dissent to his statement and it sound really preposterous to me, because Fresh News in Cambodia is not different from Fox News in the United States.

Another unthinkable and reckless behavior is when president Trump speaking in his inauguration that media organizations such as CNN and News York Times are the source of “fake News”, therefore the Fox news is the one that trustworthy. So my first reaction was like, I could not see what is fake about journalists from CNN, News York Times or Cambodia Daily, Free Asia who risking their lives every day to find the truth. Given the fact, there is no democracy without journalists or freedom of expression. So through this lesson learn, I can summarize that fake news are dangerous, and even hazard if people are not media literate, not pay close attention to the effect of fake news, and most importantly not change the way they use social media as the most important source to make a decision. As a quote from former President, Barack Obama, “It doesn’t matter how smart you are, you have to have the best information possible to make the best decision possible”. Thus, based on this quote, how can we make a better decision if all the news are fake? We have no choice but to believe it, just like Adichie said, “Shows a people as one thing, only one thing, over and over again, and that is what they become.” The quote says it all, when fake news are everywhere, we intend to make wrong and regret decision. Ironically, when fake news are more powerful to defeat democracy, it hard to get it back because we have built year and year and its can be destroyed just a blink. We don’t want to let our leader do what they want, we need to get back out voice and do the right thing.
In retrospect, social media provide us a whole new level of freedom of speech and information. It gives voices to voiceless people, built a bridge for communication between leader and public, everyone can talk and freely share their opinions, which makes a huge impacts to the decision makers. We not only have gain the access to many key things related to politics but also other important social events that only we never experienced in the past. Meanwhile social media gives us a freedom of speech, but it also invade our privacy and identity since everyone can publish without a fact-checking. Although, Google and Facebook claims to battle fake news, the positive scale of their efforts is remains small since these two major tech companies are money-making enterprises.
In conclusion, fake news are real and dangerous to our democracy and freedom of speech. The absolute power of social media roles in politics and our everyday lives are so much out of control. Undoubtedly, the misused of mass communication and social network can really segregated and bubbled us from the world, even the way we think and our emotional performance. I used to think that how can people are so dump to believe in fake news, but then I learned that it is hard to differentiate between fake news especially when they look like a real one. So we cannot blame people and media itself, but it is a great lesson learn for everyone not to believe at anything we seen and heard on social media. Furthermore, to combat fake news is not someone responsibility, but it start from everyone. We should put more effort and warned to be extra vigilant when it comes to trust social media as a main source of information.

Works Cited/References
Adichie, Chimamanda. “The danger of the Single Story.” Ted Talk, 2009, retrieved from:
Allcott, H., & Gentzkow, M. (2017, June 3). Social Media and Fake News in the 2016 Election. Retrieved December 4, 2017, from
Cain, G. (2017, November 21). Fake News and the Death of Democracy in Cambodia. Retrieved December 21, 2017, from
Confessore, N. (2017, October 9). How Russia Harvested American Rage to Reshape U.S. Politics. Retrieved December 15, 2017, from
Obama, B. (2017, January 10). President Obama’s Farewell Address: Full Video and Text. Retrieved December 15, 2017, from
Shane, S., & Isaac, M. (2017, September 7). The Fake Americans Russia Created to Influence the Election. Retrieved December 4, 2017, from
Titcomb, J., & Carson, J. (2017, November 14). Fake news: What exactly is it – and can it really swing an election? Retrieved December 4, 2017, from

My Final paper of the year, SJMC (University of Minnesota) © 2017 Love Soun

Finding You!



“It’s this way” I told him. He turned back and walked behind me. I’m trying to be cold, not to let he knows that I like him or care about him. In some way I would try some few romantic words with him.

I always feel something for him, I mean I feel cross. But it is really weird that in my dream, first time after a while that I met him, I wear some short scarf and walking somewhere on the street and meet him accidentally. I don’t know how it happen. But it seem like we for a school trip, and we stay at the same Bangalore. We lost the way to go back to our homestay. Then suddenly he said “We can’t go that way, it flooded”. Then I jumped into the water and swim. He imitated me and swim behind my back.

He say something sweet in a way like he is flirting with me. It doesn’t matter because it made me feel good anyway. I turned my back at him and smiled.

Then he come close to me and say “look at your hair, you’re a lazy girl” and he laughed. I was really embarrassing, but then to make me feel good I said, let me look at your hair then. He ran away from me, a way like a couple trying to play with each other.

I said “see! You dare not to let me see your hair cos you’re lazy too.” We laughed and continue to walk.

Still we feel like we couldn’t find the way back home. Then I saw a man walking on the street, carrying many stuffs on his back and shoulders. I asked “do you where is the place…hmm? Then the old man replied, “Where?” Then I turned back to him, do you remember where we stayed? I couldn’t recover my memory, I completely lost. Then he said “Oh, the place is sort of located at the end of the village, next to the great lake.”

The old men replied “Oh you stay at the Bangalore? I heard that there are many students came to our village. I replied, “yes, that the one. I’m one of the student. I’m so happy. Thank you.”

We continue walking from road to road, while he saying something funny. The scene of the road was pretty and difference. It look like a movie animation, there were big trees, green, silence and beautiful sounds singing from birds.” Then we reached a village.

Suddenly, I said “look at that fruits” I pointing my hand to show him. I want to eat it.

“I didn’t see why it look good, it didn’t seem tasty too,” he said in a sarcastic way.

I said “you know I always want to eat these fruits for so long. I’m glad I found it here.”

He replies, “Okay, okay I’ll buy it.” I smiled.

He said, “I want to get that fruits, can you pick up for us,” he talked to the sellers. The sellers were young and look like Chinese.

The seller pulled the fruits, and suddenly I was really disappointed. I said “Oh, it didn’t look the same to what I have seen, but still I want to eat them.” Then we bought it and eat while walking.

I didn’t remember but we didn’t make it to our homestay. I woke up. Well I wanted to go back to sleep and continue my dream but I it’s time to go to class. So I decided to wake up and happy about what I have dreamt.

It’s a beautiful moment. It made me smile for the whole week. I feel so much powerful and enthusiasm. I hope he feel the same way. Long’s distance relationship can be hard but it is possible and it is really lovely and sweet as well.

Right babe?

The Idea of Getting “Famous”


Meeting Jenny Mealey, University of Minnesota admission officer, first day officially become a U of M Student.

Everyday I would spent half of my day thinking about how to be “FAMOUS”. Seriously? yes I do. I wanted to be famous in a way of my career, a journalist and a social activist. It is really tough for young girl to develop a sense of success in such a vibrant society. My parents once told me to follow my tuition, and what’s inside me trying to tell.

….But things get terrible. I have no idea right now, where to go and what to do. I stuck in a place.

Today, I walk across the street and see some student working and implementing their project with full of energy and enthusiasm. It made me think about an uncertain future. I’m not scare actually, cos I failed too many times and it is completely okay to fail again.

…My roommate said, she was really worried about her future, how she’s going to make a living with writing. Because this path has no clue or exact element to follow.

Of course, I immediately replied ” that’s the coolest  and most conventional path we have. Look, we like freedom and we don’t want anyone to tell us what to do and who to follow.”

Although I’m always optimistic about my future, I always believe I’m going to be a very successful journalist, however the question is how? it would be really hard to answers. It takes life to figure it out. I was confused and reluctant at first to choose the path and career that I love, I follow my passion and dream. It kind of a bit scary but delightful.

My family was not really happy about my decision. Because it is not safe to be a journalist in my country. When I said I wanted to be a journalist writing on political and culture. My parents was silence for a while and replied:

… ” How do you come up with that idea? Don’t you know the situation in our country? I would be really, really happy if you choose to be a tour guide or businesswoman or teacher. I don’t mind feeding and serving you in the rest of my life,” my father says.

..”I would not sleep well if you are really becoming a journalist. Look at the job available in our village, you can stay near us and live a happy and normal life, have you seen any of journalist end up well? ” my mother says.

..”I don’t want to be or live in a normal life. I want to go out there and do something for our country. You know why we become like this? because we choose fear over other options. I wanted to be the first in our generation who step out of traditional life and go out there, to see the world,” I said.

” I hope you change your decision. Let’s me know if you need a job besides of that field, I have some pals who can connect you to a good job” father says.

“Thanks I don’t need one. Let’s me learn doing things by myself. I want to see how far I can go and how deep I can dive,” I said.

“You always arrogant and too much optimism. Just so know you won’t lose pride coming back and ask for help. I will always be there for you,” my father said.

“wait and see,” I said.

I made it first out of my hometown. I won a full-ride scholarship and majored in Tourism management in Cambodia, date back to 2016. I love that field too but it is too much into money making and profit. I don’t feel like I making any changes or contribution back concerning to my thinking ability. I born as a thinker, introverted and like being solitude. In some way I pose a great talent in writing and thinking.

It is unusual for me to study Journalism or wanting to be a journalist. The most scaring job every parent wish not to hear from their beloved daughter. It would let them questioned “why” for years. In Asian country, rarely woman desire to be a reporters, so only a few made it to the top.

The place where I belong to, everyone is honor and obey their parent wishes. They choose a path that designed or asked by their parents or family, relatives, teacher or market demand. So all of them are majored in science, engineering, and the vast majority are teacher. It is the most safest jobs and well-paid too. That’s what my parent wish I should have said to them. They would be really happy to hear that, but that’s not gonna happen.

As I remember, there’s only few of my classmates, friends and relatives choose to walk in a conventional path, like I do. So they have to pass through many fights and experiments. I admired them, and I’m so proud of myself too, always.

I wish that school won’t teach children to choose a major or career. I wish that every parents would accept and provide a positive reinforcements to their children in term of this matter. That may be when the change start to begin.

Now I majored in Professional Journalism at The University of Minnesota. I couldn’t be more proud than making this decision. It open me up to the world where I want to build and grow. I have six female mentors who successful, conventional and bold — the most precious things I ever have. I’m happy now. I just want to say, follow our heart and passion, we will find love and success.

There only thing left is how to be “famous”? How to be  the first? Well, it obvious. I’m a member of Society of Professional Journalist (SPJ), The WAKE magazine, and Ads club at the University of Minnesota. No wonder I plan to rise to the top within two or three year.